Has a follower turned into a social media stalker? Local expert reveals 4 alarming signs

• Popular Netflix show YOU both fascinated and frightened audiences who found themselves mesmerised by its unique and creepy premise.
• However, there are lessons to be learned from the show about potentially dangerous online interactions with strangers. 
• Online privacy expert Trevor Cooke shares the four most common signs of online stalking to look out for.

The influencer-led age of Web 2.0 is characterised by the mentality that "everything is content." 

For the sake of having things to film and photograph to upload online in an endless stream of content, people have flung the doors of their lives wide open. This also opens people up to a host of potential threats as they may unknowingly be providing a potential stalker with personal information. In the worst case scenario, this can lead to unwanted in-person encounters, blackmailing or even scams. 

Trevor Cooke, an online privacy expert at EarthWeb, shares the four most common signs of online stalking to look out for. 

Excessive messaging and commenting

Allow me to get a little personal for a second. 

When I first opened my Twitter account more than a decade ago, a young, good-looking man followed me. I followed him back, as this was common courtesy at the time, and he began interacting with me frequently. After a while, I became suspicious and checked his timeline to establish a pattern of behaviour. 

There, I noticed that he had barely any followers and only interacted with me on his public timeline. 

I concluded that this was a catfish account and shared my suspicions with a friend. Shortly thereafter, the account disappeared and she was the only person I had shared my suspicions with. 

According to Cooke: "If you notice that a specific user is sending you messages constantly and commenting on all of your posts, this may be a red flag."

He warns:

We all have family members who interact a little bit too much on social media, and although it is annoying, it is harmless. But if you notice someone displaying the same familiar behaviours and you have no idea who they are, that’s a different story.

He adds: "The fastest action you can take to stop this potential stalker in their tracks is to block them on all of your social media accounts.

Unusual patterns in social media interactions

Once a stalker has gleaned enough information about you online, they may know who your close friends and companions are. If you begin to notice that an unknown person is friend-requesting your friends and family members and interacting with them on social media channels as well, then they may be trying to get more information about you from other sources.

"This can become a threat to your safety if the stalker eventually learns important information about you like your place of work or your home address," says Cooke before adding: "my best advice is to trust your gut and if you feel like someone is digitally stalking you, then get the police involved."

ALSO READ | From real-life nightmare to menacing series: The chilling truth behind Netflix's Baby Reindeer

A vast majority of people are stalked by people they already know. From acquaintances to former partners, stalkers can be anyone.

"If you have a problematic ex-partner who you still have friended on social media who you notice has become much more active, keep your eyes open for real-life sightings."

"Take screenshots of problematic online interactions so that you can report the stalking to the authorities with proof."  

Receiving inappropriate gifts

Extreme online stalkers will find a way to get your personal info so that they can either send you things at your place of work, to your work or personal email, or even to your home mailbox.

If the stalker has the goal of making you feel scared, they may take photos of you and send them to you through online messaging to make you aware that they are watching you. 

Trevor says, "Other inappropriate gifts include items that have deep emotional meaning to you that only someone who knows you really well would know to give, as well as items that are related to things you have shown interest in on social media."

Any kind of surprise gift from a stranger is weird, especially if the gift is far too personal for it to be a coincidence. 

Suspicious knowledge of your personal info 

If you start interacting with someone online and they say things about you that seem suspiciously accurate, they may be stalking you online.

It is normal to casually browse a person's Instagram or other social media accounts when you first meet them and to joke about 'stalking' them with your friends, but real stalkers take it to a whole new level. 

"Think about the popular Netflix show YOU," says Trevor.

"The main character, Joe, is really good at using a fake account on social media to stalk women and find out exactly what they like. He then uses that information to woo them, but sometimes, he slips up and sends a message about something that he wouldn’t have known unless he was stalking the other person. Although this is a TV show and is unrealistic in many ways, that specific kind of slip-up is something to look out for if you meet someone new online."

Tips to avoid online stalkers:

- Information supplied by Journalist Insights on behalf of EarthWeb.